A wedding rehearsal dinner is not required, but it
is a great way to start your wedding festivities. This occasion gives
your friends and family members the opportunity to meet and get to know
each other. Most of these people will be meeting each other for the first
time, and will be connected by your marriage. You will also have special
family and friends out for your wedding. It is wonderful to be able to
spend more time with them, than just the wedding day where they will see
you along with a crowd.
Who Pays? Who is Invited?
The rehearsal dinner is traditionally paid for by the parents of the groom,
but this is no longer a requirement. Sometimes the bride and groom will
host it, or it may be hosted by several people. It is customary that they
send the invitations and include the immediate family of the bride and
groom, your clergy person or officiant and their spouse, and the entire
wedding party and their spouses or special guests. If you have friends
from out of town who have already arrived, they should also be invited.
The invitations should be less formal than your wedding invitations. It
is also a good idea to include RSVP cards that have guests choose their
dinner option, along with the dinner invitations.
Name Tags and Seating Arrangements
It is a good idea to provide name tags for your guests as this is probably
the first time many of them will be meeting. Explanations after the names
can be helpful, such as Lisa Smith-Bridesmaid. You might also create a
seating arrangement, so that people you think would get along nicely,
but who don't yet know each other, can visit over dinner. The bride and
groom should be seated at a focal table with their immediate families,
or with their wedding party members.
Another great way for your guests to get to know each other: after everyone
is seated, the bride and groom stand up and introduce each person to the
group..."This is Rachel, my bridesmaid, we grew up together and have
been friends forever..."
Location, Location, Location
There are unlimited options for the rehearsal dinner location. The parent’s
home may be large enough to accommodate the group. In that case, outdoor
barbecues or theme parties are fun and festive. If you have your rehearsal
dinner in a restaurant you should consider a limited menu offering to
keep the meal timely as well as cut costs. Also, decide ahead of time
if drinks will be provided, or paid for by each guest. It is a nice idea
to give your rehearsal dinner a different style and menu than your wedding.
If your wedding has a formal sit down dinner featuring chicken and steak,
have the rehearsal dinner in a more casual environment with Thai food.
What Happens At The Dinner?
If your dinner will be held in a private room at a restaurant, or at a
private residence, have a table of appetizers setup and have a cocktail
hour before sitting for dinner. This is lots of fun and it allows people
to meet and chat before everyone is sat at their separate tables.
The rehearsal dinner is traditionally the time for the father of the groom
to make his formal toast to the couple. It is also the perfect time to
give out attendant gifts, perhaps set out at each place setting as their
placecards. It is also a great time to thank both sets of parents for
all they have done for you, in front of everyone. This dinner can make
for some touching and memorable moments - make sure someone has a video
camera and/or photo camera.
Today, many couples are using the rehearsal dinner as an opportunity to
show videos or photo montages about the bride and groom and their families.
This further helps new family members get to know each other and the bride
or groom. This video is also a sentimental keepsake. Copies may be burned
to CD and handed out as favors at the dinner.
This dinner is also a great time to break out the Groom's Cake! A yummy
chocolate cake is enjoyed by everyone!
What Happens After The Dinner?
Talk ahead of time with your attendees, many find it fun to plan a party
to follow the rehearsal and dinner. Having an afternoon rehearsal and
early dinner makes this option more enjoyable. If this occasion is the
night before your wedding, make sure you get in bed at a decent hour!
You will need to be rested (and not hung over) for your wedding day. Your
wedding day is one where you want to feel your best!
By Michelle O'Connor |
